Thoughts of a foundation student

This week has been a rollercoaster, and I ended up feeling burnt out. I thought a long time about whether I want to write about my experience, but ultimately feel like it is important to acknowledge that life can get in the way of study. And life really got in the way this week.

Some days have been superb. My feedback for my first assignment was good, and as expected. I was elated when I saw one of the suggestions I had for the Discuss forum had been actioned; it was a small change but it felt great knowing I had an impact. OCA Learn migrated to a new hosting provider so during downtime I also had some downtime. 

Other days have been abysmal. The week began with my late father’s birthday and ended with my late father-in-law’s birthday. I was not prepared for the waves of grief to return, but they did. I received my feedback from my tutor on my father’s birthday - and it suddenly occurred to me that I could not share the news. I recall the year before he died when he mentioned how he regretted being discouraging about me pursuing my writing. He would be so happy to see me now.

On the weekend I travelled 500 miles for my father-in-law’s memorial service on an overpriced and overcrowded train. It was lovely seeing my extended family, and I was touched to see some of my father-in-law’s creative writing framed on the wall. In the final year of his life he spoke often about writing his memoirs, but by then he was in too much pain and his eyesight had deteriorated. 

I will not share his words, because they are not mine to share, but the piece he wrote brought me to tears. It was clear he was anticipating his imminent death. Yet in that time he had tremendous love for his life.

I was feeling reflective on my train journey home. One of the best things about distance learning is that I can do it anywhere, so I logged into my account and busied myself. Within half an hour of sitting in my carriage, I typed up my latest learning log post while listening to last month’s Booklab. I feel like I always have my college in my pocket, and my favourite ebooks are just a click away.

Thinking about ebooks reminded me to check if there are any new titles in OCA Library. I browsed a couple of titles and then made a note to book onto the How to Have Ideas workshop. I am in dire need of ideas. My next assignment is going to involve flexing my fiction muscles, and I am keenly aware of how underdeveloped they are. 

I read a fantastic post in the Study Tips in 5 blog series about how to process feedback. I started a commonplace book, and I take it with me when I do my daily walk. I made a note of my feedback from my tutor and designed a map of where my writing could possibly go. It reads like a holiday bucket list, and my task for the rest of the month is to look for patterns and themes. Hopefully something will spring out to me, and that will spawn a piece for my next assignment.